How could Rimmon have missed this? Indeed, the only way to conquer death would be to go to the only One whom death could not hold: the Son. However, since they could not access the Son, they could go to the One who had claimed to be in the Son as the Son is in the Father: Shiloh.
Babel versus Shiloh: The Great Duel; the Adventures of Babel, the Great Commander; the Tales of Babel the Envious. Seated on the bed, I faced the doctor. I ruminated on which one of these titles best described my informal confession. How will I be seen in the eternity to come? Will I be remembered for my feats? Will they, or I, be mentioned at all?
When I was an angel, I talked like an angel; I thought like an angel; I reasoned like an angel. When I became a demon, I put angelic ways behind me.
I had sworn allegiance to that mission statement after the Great Rebellion against the Enemy. I believed that, but how do I explain what happened at Armageddon? I would have to account for my actions to our Horned Father.
“Shiloh is indeed the originator of Babel’s emotions shifting from worship to hatred,” Rammun began. “The bliss brought by Shiloh’s presence and the energy to try to annihilate it is strong enough to drive any spiritual being mad. Nevertheless, Babel loves Shiloh, the Invisible Enemy, who always speaks about His King, the Enemy’s Son. And during the Son’s earthly ministry, He referred to His Father, the Enemy; therefore, Babel is in love with the Enemy without knowing it.”
After all those years, I finally understood the reason behind young Babel’s premonition on that day as I stood in front of Shiloh in this horrible place. The ambiguity of my situation overwhelmed me. My body remained in Zebulun’s cell in the present, and my spirit lingered in a concentration camp in the past, but Shiloh seemed to have mastered the past, present, and future—all at once. He saw, in the past, my old spirit coming back to this location from the future, which became the present.
“Now go on, Doctor,” Rammun said as they stood and moved back to the chair. “Remember, something drastic must be done to be crowned Master of the Citadel.”
Rimmon sat and tipped his head from side to side. “Will my spirit hold? Love is too heavy to atone.”
Standing next to the chair where Rimmon sat, Rammun looked to the ceiling and rested a hand on the doctor’s shoulder. “But lighter than sin.”
I had been asked on many occasions: “How was it like to drift alongside Shiloh?”
Nobody knew because nobody had done it. Nobody but me, that is. Not even the archangels had had that privilege. Gabriel and Michael were allowed only an hour with Him, at most, during their annual meetings. I spent years with the Counselor. So whenever I was asked that question, I remained vague. Let them guess.
Although no one could contradict me, I preferred not to provide any details. Deep down, nothing I said could do the experience justice. Also, not talking about Him eased the pain of remembering my mission. And it did. The stained wings forget.